I know it's been a while since we've talked, I thought about you I promise, it's just, well you know how the winter is and there never seemed to be a good time, and, maybe there never will be, but I need you to know something.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry I worry about breaking bones more than breaking you. I'm sorry she bruised me but forgot you altogether. I'm sorry I didn't fight harder... for both of us. I'm sorry I was wired this way, that I can't remember anything happy before 9th grade. Because you, you deserve all the happy. I'm sorry because I'm selfish. I forgot the sound of your voice and maybe that's the reason you forgot how to feel. I'm sorry for all the grudges I've made you hold, and the empty I love yous. I'm sorry for the bricks, I thought I was protecting myself but didn't realize I was killing you in the process. I'm sorry it's taken so long.
On Monday they said I was strong, but I didn't feel strong. I think they were talking to you. Thank you for being strong... for both of us.
I know I've told you it's okay to stop, begged you to, but promise me you won't until you find hope and there's more than blood coursing through our veins because I don't know when that time will come but I know it's worth waiting for.
The only hope I can offer right now, is one day we'll look back and smile. Because if we can get through this....We may not be okay now, but we will be.
Thank You.
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